Bluefish
John C. Mannone
My
three children—ten, eight and six
counting
down their ages—would explore
the
Miocene cliffs in Southern Maryland.
We’d
hunt for twenty-five million-year old
shark
teeth along with ancient shells and bits
of
bone in sand and clay and in the water’s ebb.
All
timeless as memories. The Chesapeake Bay
hinted
its salt in the air; didn’t sting like brine
from
tears of failed marriages. My children—
the
only thing precious from that.
They
were always hungry for food
for
relationships.
So I
would cook up adventures
in a
cliff top cottage with a screened-in porch.
I
remember their wide-eyed faces
staring
at the fish I bought from a man
on
the dock—fresh bluefish still
flopping
its broad, forked tail in the bucket,
the
sharp edge of its dorsal fin swung
out
of its groove as if a switchblade.
The bluish green under the fin, fading.
It
quivered in my hands as I pressed
its
belly. Carefully wrapped it in newspaper.
We climbed up the
100-foot high cliff
on the same
crooked wooden steps we angled down
an hour before.
When we got back to the cottage
they’d insist on
watching me clean
the fish for
supper. I said to them
always respect the
life of another,
even the fish you
have to kill to eat.
I didn’t pray much
at the time,
but there was a
moment of silence; the fish
on the cutting
board, knife in my hand.
And the stainless
steel sink prepared as an altar.
I had the kids
turn their heads for a moment
while I quickly
severed the head of that bluefish.
My youngest asked
me if it went to heaven.
I said I didn’t
know, that it wasn’t a pet.
Its eyes stared
back: wet, black, glassy.
They fixed their
eyes on the blood
washing past the
single row of sharp teeth in its jaws,
and down the sink
drain.
Their bites sharp
as razors.
They can be pretty
mean, I said, and
greedy, too,
especially when frenzied.
After scaled and
eviscerated, I sliced
the dark gray-blue
flesh into steaks;
they shimmered
under kitchen light.
I layered them in
the bottom of the blue
porcelain
pot with bay leaves and peppercorns,
parsley
and a little dill; quartered onions,
green
pepper eighths; a bottle of Beck’s beer
with
foam, a splash of vinegar to seal the pores,
and
a can of Italian plum tomatoes.
The
pot clacked on the stove as the liquid
simmered.
We spoke of joy, of sharing
even
in that cottage, on those cliffs
with
all their buried secrets. We had unearthed
some
of them that day, not hidden as deep
as I
thought.
I
ladled the broth mixture over rice, and the fish.
All its blue gone,
changed to soft gray.
Poet’s Notes: As I mention in a recent spotlight for this poem at Split
Rick Review http://www.splitrockreview.org/news/2015/1/4/contributor-spotlight-john-c-mannone,
“Bluefish” emerged from several influences. I talk about some of them there
(the abiding image Cathy Smith Bowers talks about, Ellen Bass’ poem “What Did I Love” about killing
chickens, and my recollections of bluefish). So I’ll briefly mention one other here: family and food
poetry.
Bluefish is a
remarkable species and delectable as far as I’m concerned. I created the
original recipe with mackerel caught off the Florida Keys when I was first
learning to scuba dive in the early 70s. The fishermen on the dock were kind
enough to give me several mackerel for me and my family and friends joining me
on a December vacation (but I had to clean them). I’ve since then used salmon
and rockfish (ubiquitous in MD where I grew up). So, I can attest to the recipe
suggested in the poem.
But of
course, the poem is much more about relationships than about food. Food does
bring families together and can often provide a metaphor for that. Most of the
things mentioned in “Bluefish” are true, but may have been collaged from
several trips. Interestingly enough, I invented what my youngest son had asked
(if the fish had gone to heaven).
I had been
working on a collection of poems in which food has a prominent presence, but
it’s not a bunch of recipes in verse. I think I will pepper the poetry
collection with anecdotes about the food, and of course, about my family, too.
“Bluefish” will be numbered among them.
Editor’s Note: I like the mood that the poet creates here, the gentle
narrative style, and the preserved magic of that special day. There is
also something to be said for the fish stew recipe! “Bluefish” was previously published in Split Rock Review, summer 2014.